


just a fucking clown

by heyimal_ex



Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Gay Richie, Help, Hurt Richie, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Protective Eddie, Richie Angst, Richie centric, direct reference to alcoholism, if u know what i mean, richie gets taken by pennywise instead of bev, richie gets what eddie got, richie toziers parents r bad, richies mom is an alcoholic, semi? graphic depictions of violence, takes place right after arcade scene, this is the fifth hurt richie fic i’ve written in 2 weeks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-10
Updated: 2019-10-10
Packaged: 2020-11-28 17:13:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20970119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heyimal_ex/pseuds/heyimal_ex
Summary: richie thought bowers figuring out his secret was the worst thing that could happen to him today. then the clown shows up, and he wishes he never opened his fat trap and jinxed itor : It takes richie instead of bev and eddie is very not okay with this





	just a fucking clown

“i think i just shit my pants.”

richie lays there, chest heaving and head pounding as he struggles to keep his head lifted up. after a few moments, he accepts the losing battle, and lets it fall to the ground with a loud thump. the world around him shifts in and out of focus as he tries desperately to focus on a cloud or two above him.

the statue - the fucking Paul Bunion statue that always seemed to loom a little too high in the center of town - had just come to life and fucking chased him. 

holy shit.

it feels like everybody’s staring at him, but he doesn’t know if it’s because of the little secret Bowers had just stumbled his way through understanding, or because he looked like a goddamn crack addict. 

despite his shaking limbs and unsteady heartbeat, he slowly began to push himself to his feet, struggling to find any sort of balance. he just wanted to be home, under his covers - he prayed his parents weren’t at the house, so he could just go upstairs and crash. 

life doesn’t love him that much, though, because as he began to stumble his way back towards his house, he heard the oh-so familiar sound of a laughing clown over his shoulder. fear possessed him from head to toe as he slowly turned around, all moisture sucked straight from his mouth. his heart was in his knees. his blood was rushing in his ears. 

he was alone. 

pennywise sat atop the shoulder of the now perfectly-fixed Paul Bunion statue that has terrorized him moments later. at first, it didn’t say anything, just making deadly eye contact with richie with a heavy silence surrounding them. everyone at the park was quiet, staring as if lost in time, completely unaware but frozen in place. 

richie wanted to burst into tears. 

“i’m so lonely, richie.” the clowns face spread until there was blood pouring out the cuts and dribbling down his chin like spit. “i’m so, so lonely! nobody ever wants to play games anymore.”

“what the fuck.” richie sounded like bill when he spoke, stuttering as his shaky hands lifted up to adjust his cracked glasses. 

“i know! let’s play a game! how about...hide and seek?” the light seemed to glint off of the clowns eyes. “no, too easy. ooh! how about...” he laughed sadistically, climbing to his feet so that he was now standing perfectly balanced on Paul’s shoulder. 

“how about truth or dare?”

richie took a step back. fear made his blood run cold in his veins. 

“oh, but you wouldn’t want to pick truth, would you!” just like that, the clown had leapt off his platform. he was airborne, the balloons clutched in his hands helping him to float painfully slowly towards richie. the other began to scramble back desperately, falling over himself in the process as pennywise began singing a sick, demented tune, getting closer to him all the while. 

“i know your secret! your dirty little secret!”

richie swears he’s about to shit himself for real. his eyes are blown up impossibly wide as he stares at the clown, knowing truly that he had absolutely no defense. he had no backup. 

he was so fucked. 

he hit the bench behind him and realized that he probably couldn’t keep running without taking his eyes off the clown in front of him, which wasn’t really an option. bev’s words echoed in his head “we were together! that’s why none of us died!” 

but that’s not true anymore. he was alone. no losers were there to help him or save him, and he felt utterly trapped, like a wild animal with the hunter standing in front of him. 

he did the only thing he knew how to do best, and denied. he squeezed his eyes as tightly as he could together and began to repeat “its not real” like a mantra. again and again, voice bursting with desperation and fright and need, he repeated the words, fingers gripping at his pants. 

he opened his eyes again, and whimpered as the clown stared straight back at him, now practically inches away from his nose. 

pennywise opened its mouth as wide as it could, and the last thing richie saw before everything went black was the rows and rows of teeth coming closer and closer. 

🎈

“he should be back by now.” eddies fingers drummed away on his knee as the hammock creaked under his weight. across from him, stan, bev and bill were sitting on the ground, each of them with a toy or comic in hand to keep themselves occupied. 

“richie is horrible with time. or most things, really.” stan remarked, his poor attempt at comforting the other. when there was no visible change in eddies scowl or stressed shoulders, he sighed, dropping his toy to give the other actual attention. “he’s fine, man. he’s probably just running late.”

“two hours late??” eddie demanded. 

big bill shrugged from where he was, delicately leaning against beverlys shoulder. “maybe. he’s buh-been this late before to things and yuh-you’ve never been this worried.”

“because there wasn’t a feral clown on the lose before!” eddies hands flew up in exasperation. “fuck you guys. if he isn’t here in, like, twenty seconds, i’m going looking for him.”

“he’s gonna be in his bed. probably taking a nap or smoking.” bev spoke up, head completely hidden behind the comic she had bought from the convenience store. 

eddie huffed. “i fucking hope so. then i get to smack him a couple of times.”

they all sat in silence. each of them counted to twenty silently in their heads. at the final number, eddie was up, practically stomping his way across the clubhouse. 

“ugh- wait.” stan dragged himself to his feet, and bill and bev closely followed suit. “fine. if you wanna check on him so badly, we’ll come with.”

eddie didn’t hear. he was already halfway up the ladder, taking each step two at a time. with a long and annoyed sigh, the group of three followed him with loyalty. 

🎈

“well, here goes nothin’.”

Eddies knuckles rapped against the tozier family’s front door. the silence that hung in the air was a few moments too long, and the four had almost come to a quiet consensus that no one was home when the noises began. the losers took a step back as a loud tumble and bang was heard inside, footsteps making their way to the door. 

it opened, and the smell of alcohol nearly made eddie choke on his own breath. 

eddie had never really had the pleasure of meeting richies parents. to his understanding, they weren’t around much, and richie made no attempt to talk about them other than in passing. eddie has a vague, vague memory of a woman with light blond hair letting him into the house once years ago, but there was no way that woman was the same one standing in front of him. 

she was a mess. she was gripping onto the door with one hand and holding an empty wine glass in the other. it was stained with recent alcohol, and red lip stains decorated the rim. her hair was messy and unkept, and despite wearing nice clothing, they were ruffled and wrinkled on her body. she had fallen asleep in her makeup the night before, and the area under her eyes was completely smudged a dark black. when she looked at them, it was only through the slits in her eyes, seemingly unable to open them any wider. 

“if you’re selling something, i don’t want it.” she slurred out, and eddie had to fight the scowl that was forming on his face. it was about two pm, and this woman was as drunk as a scantily clad twenty two year old at a rave. her eyes weren’t even focused on them as they began to talk. 

“we-we’re richies friends.” bill spoke up. god bless him. the leader of the group, arguably the fastest thinker - the only one who could recover fast enough from this to be able to act normal. 

or maybe he already knew about this situation. the idea of bill knowing about richie’s home life and not eddie left a stinging feeling in the center of his chest, but he wasn’t entirely sure why. 

“richard? oh, he, uh-“ the woman squeezed her eyes shut tightly and reached up to rub stubbornly at the side of her head. “i believe she went to that little arcade he loves so much. took a few coins out of my purse.”

eddie sighed in relief. of course richie was at the aladdin. he probably just forgot about their hang out and went to play some street fighter - something he’ll be very angry about later, but was very relieved to hear now. 

“thank you, ma’am.” stan said a little too fast, and the four losers spun on the back of their feet to walk away. they had no interest staying any longer. 

“what the fuck.” bev was the first to speak once the door had shut behind them, mrs. tozier probably off to down another bottle. 

“i had no idea.” as they climbed onto their bikes, stan was holding his handlebars a little too tight, staring a hole into the ground beneath him. 

“i knew something was wr-wrong.” bill mumbled. “but i didn’t know it was thih-this bad. i knew there was a ruh-reason he didn’t talk about his puh-parents much.”

“yeah.” eddie mumbled, unable to find it in him to say much else. “let’s...let’s find him,  
please. i’ll know what to make of this when we make sure he’s safe at the aladdin.”

richie was not at the aladdin. they drove there as fast as they could and essentially tore the place apart, but of all the kids in there, none of them was their trashmouth. they even approached the manager of the place and asked if richie had been there earlier. 

“oh, the kid with the glasses?” eddie nodded impatiently. “yeah, he was here, but a little situation happened and he left.”

“a little situation?” stan asked, all four of them listening to the mans every word. 

he sighed and rubbed out the cigarette he was smoking on to his ash tray. “i probably shouldn’t be tellin’ you kids, but eh, fuck it. i just caught the end of it, so i ain’t sure who or what started it, but that bowers kid was really givin four eyes a piece of his mind. callin’ him some real ugly names.”

“like what?”

“well, i don’t like to go around just callin’ people this - if it’s true, it’s pretty serious, but he was labelin’ him a homosexual.” he whistled and leaned back in his chair, shaking his head like a disappointed father. “sure hope it ain’t true. even god can’t save that kinda behavior.”

eddie felt like the world was closing in around him. he swallowed hard, and nodded, and thanked the man for telling them everything he knew. the man wished them luck in finding their friend, and then they took their leave. 

no one spoke as they rode their bikes, and there was a silent knowledge as to where they were headed. 

it took them just five minutes to get to the kissing bridge and dump their bikes. stan made an offhanded comment about how he would kill richie if someone took his ride, but all eddie could supply was a grunt of agreement. 

the worry was practically choking the words out of him but he couldn’t explain why he cared so much. he just needed to find richie - needed to find him before bowers, or worse, It, could do anything to him. 

the trek into the sewers was worse the second time. gray water seemed to cling to eddies clothes and soak into his skin, cold and clammy and disgusting. for a motion of comfort, beverly made sure to squeeze his hand as tightly as possible - and eddie found himself squeezing back. 

eddie couldn’t get that mans words out of his head. bowers had accused richie of being a homosexual. 

why did eddie care so much? why did his heart ache so bad when he thought about anything happening to rich? why did his eyes linger on his lips a little too long whenever richie was talking? why did his heart expand in his chest when richie went on one of his tangents, so, so happy and full of life and his eyes positively shining and eddie swears he could die right then and there and be happy. 

but he doesn’t have that right now. richie is gone and if he’s hurt - or worse - eddie doesn’t know what he’s going to do. 

he just wants to see his eyes twinkle again, but he forces that thought out because it’s a little too much to handle at the moment. 

the twists and turns they traveled down in the sewer only seemed to lead further and further into the towns systems, away from the sunlight. they hadn’t had been in this particular part before - they had stood outside, richie cracking insensitive jokes and everyone telling him to shut the fuck up, but they hadn’t quite explored inside. 

the smell was nauseating. every echo that reverberated back to them sounded like the clown laughing. it probably was the clown laughing. 

eddie took a hit of his inhaler and kept moving. 

🎈

when richie came too, the first thing he realized was how incredibly cold it was. 

he peeled his eyes open, but it didn’t seem to do much good, as the area around him was still insufferably dark. he was laying down, in a puddle no less, with his face pressed against the wet cement. with a groan and some pretty shaky limbs, he pushed himself up by his arms, practically peeling himself off of the cold sewer floor. 

sewer. he was in the sewer. there was a small, minuscule amount of light coming in above him, and the area smelled absolutely horrible, to the point where he was fighting the need to block his nose. 

he couldn’t see. he realized this rather quickly and began fumbling for his glasses, water running in between his fingers as he searched the hard ground. he tried to push what eddie had said earlier about this kind of water - “it’s just piss and shit!” - but he felt himself getting sick to the stomach nonetheless. 

“fuck, i can’t see a fucking thing-“ his hand shot out further and further, fingers finally closing around something. his shoulders relaxed, and he moved to bring the object closer so he could hopefully slip his frames onto the bridge of his nose. 

the object didn’t move. 

richie squinted and raised his head, making out a messy blob of orange, red, and-

“shit.” he yelped and stumbled back, feet sliding underneath him like a cartoon dog trying to run. he jumped to his feet as quickly as possible, his hawaiian shirt dragging in the water, and began to run, repeating the mantra “shit! shit! shit!” over and over again until his mouth became raw. 

no matter how fast he could run, he would never be able to run from It. this was confirmed when a hand closed around his neck, whipping him around and chuckling when he whimpered. pennywise was staring him in the eyes. their faces were inches apart and richie could smell the putrid breath wafting in waves into his face. the monster slowly began to lift him, his legs left suspended over the floor. he began to choke and rasp, the grip around his neck tightening every second. 

he let out a choked sob of fear. “let me go.” he croaked and kicked as hard as possible, still feeling sour from whatever beating he had taken prior to this. 

“oh, richie.” pennywise’s smile stretched beyond any humans normal face, making a literal definition of “an ear to ear smile”. richie wanted to cry, to scream, to run, but he was stuck there, gasping for air, held above the ground and positively frozen with fear. “we’re not even close to the amount of fun i’m gonna have with you.”

a few moments passed and all richie could do was struggle for breath. 

in the far, far distance, he heard someone scream - eddie? was eddie here? was eddie going to save hi-

something pierced his abdomen and he screamed loud enough to shake the floor beneath them. 

pennywise grinned. 

🎈

“come on!” eddie was running now, his slippery fingers struggling to hold the flashlight beam steady in front of him. “holy shit, holy shit!”

just moments before, eddie heard what could only describe as the absolute worst sound he had experienced in his life. richie screaming, loud and terrified, successfully making every one of eddies thoughts shut down so that all his attention was directed towards one - save him. 

bill, stan and bev were right on his tail, their fear now doubling tenfold as well. the entire time, they had been going along with eddie, but as soon as they stepped foot in the sewers, the bad feeling the smallest of the three had been experiencing washed over all of them. they didn’t feel whole, didn’t feel secure - they felt like they were missing something, missing their trashmouth, his shitty jokes and bad timing and irrefutable ability to make you laugh in the worst of moments. 

eddie ran hard enough to make his legs burn and only stopped once he entered the main center of the derry sewers. behind him, he heard the rest of the present losers club skid to a halt, but not because of him - because of what was lying in front of them. 

eddie screamed richies name. he screamed it again and again and stumbled forward, reaching out desperately for his best friend. 

richie was held suspended. pennywise stood behind him, a large claw pierced through the boys stomach and freese’s t shirt. the blood was falling in clumps, creating a whole pool beneath the two. his glasses were gone, and his eyes were completely glossed over, staring at everything and nothing at the same time. blood dribbled down his chin like spit. he looked fucking horrifying. 

“richie!!” eddie screams again and he feels like his heart may shatter in his chest. pennywise only smiles at the sight, smiles as eddie thrashes in stan and bills hold, completely ready to attack the clown all on his own. 

“you fucking asshole!!!” the tears are falling as heavy as ever. “fucking let him go! let him go! give him back!!! don’t fucking touch him just give him back right now!! richie!!!!!” 

It grins at him. “how about this, eddie?” he drawls and sticks out his lower lip in a pout. “you’re sad face is upsetting me so much i may consider it! i can’t resist those puppy dog eyes.” he began to shake the arm connected to the claw, and within a few moments, richie hit the ground with a sickening thunk. he doesn’t move, doesn’t even react, just lays there, blood now covering his face and arms from landing in his own pool. pennywise glances at his claw with a frown, having the balls to act disgusted by how dirty it was. 

eddie didn’t care. he was moving as fast as his legs could carry him, and bill, stan and bev were all behind him. 

bill already had his sweatshirt off by the time they got to their friend and immediately began to press it against the massive hole in his stomach. eddie lifted up richies head, still sobbing loudly as he placed it on his lap. he could barely see the other through his tears, so he blinked them away stubbornly, wanting nothing more than to look at richie right now. 

his head was lolled to the side. he was awake but not responsive, considering the fact his eyelashes kept fluttering, but he didn’t even wince when bill pressed aggressively against his wound. 

“richie.” eddie was begging, he knew that, but he couldn’t help but grapple for the others hand and squeeze it as tightly as possible. “richie, richie, fuck, fuck please wake up, i can’t live without you richie none of us can please - oh my fucking god-“ 

he leaned over the other in a protective hold, arms wrapping around him and giving him his best current attempt at a hug. “don’t leave me.” he croaked. “i love you so much. i swear i’ll protect you if you get through this. i’ll get you away from your shitty mom, i’ll give you the life you deserve just don’t - don’t fucking leave me, richie-“

“will your mom....be there..?”

as richie spoke, eyes peeled open and wincing in pain, more blood bubbled over his chin and onto his chest below. if the situation were any less serious, eddie may have made some stupid comment about the other needing a bib, but he couldn’t think about that right now. 

instead, he just kissed the other desperately. 

stan, bill and bev all watched in relative shock, but said absolutely nothing. richie, shaking and unsteady, reciprocated the kiss, hand reaching up and cradling the others face. in the process, he smeared blood across eddies cheek, which he knew he would get chewed out for later. 

eddie pulled away but immediately went right back, pressing his sweaty lips against richies equally as sweaty forehead instead. “okay. you’re okay.” he repeated like a mantra, cradling the others skull and rocking him back and forth like a baby. “you’re gonna be okay. i’m gonna protect you. i fucking- i swear to it i know i’m weak but i will die before i let you die, rich, i swear to fucking god-“

richies eyes began to fall closed. the hand that had been cradling eddies fell uselessly to his side and eddie was screaming his name all over again. “rich! rich! fucking- stay awake. don’t you dare fall asleep on me you asshole. you absolute trashmouth. you think i can live without your shit talk?”

“it hurts so fucking bad eds.” eddie feels his heart break in his chest, and he doesn’t even bother to correct the other in that stupid nickname. 

“i know, i know, but you’re gonna be okay. we’re gonna get you to the hospital, i swear, bill, please, fucking help me-“ he looks up to see where on earth the others could be right now, but they weren’t looking at him. instead, they were gazing up at It, hanging over them with his eyes open and a hungry look set deep within them. 

“get the fuck away.” eddie snarled, and for once, and for no explainable reason, he felt no fear towards the monster that had been terrorizing him and his friends for months. the monster he had constant nightmares about. the monster that had broken his fucking arm. the monster that seemed to plague him everywhere he went suddenly seemed so small, because the biggest threat facing him now was losing richie, and nothing could match that. “i’m not gonna let you get even close to him so don’t even try. you’re just a fucking clown.”

the thing stared, and stared, and stared, and eddie held richie closer, feeling his blood practically boil. 

“didn’t you hear me?” his voice cracked with how loud he screamed. “get the fuck out! you’re not touching him! you’re just a fucking clown!”

the monster snarled, seemed to debate for a few moments, and then slunk back into the shadows. 

eddie couldn’t care less. he desperately called for bill or stan to help him again and, this time, they actually responded. bill rushed over and leaned down, slipping one hand behind richies shoulder blades and the other underneath his legs. muttering a small apology, he hoisted up, and all of them winced at how loud richie yelped in pain. 

“it hurts, it hurts, it hurts so fucking back.” richie was becoming delirious with blood loss, and his head rolled around against bills chest, eyes dazed and unfocused. 

eyes. eddies heart dropped. “his glasses.” he muttered, shaking his head as he began to look around desperately. “where are his glasses?”

“eds-“ bev reached out a hand to comfort him, but he flinched away, eyes still scanning the ground beneath him. 

“he can’t see without his glasses, bev, he needs his glasses-“

“eddie.” stan spoke so loudly and clearly and eddie actually stopped, turning to look at the other. “look at richie.” 

the boy was curled up in bills arms, moaning and groaning in pain. stan was standing next to bill, keeping constantly pressure on the wound through his stomach, but richie kept twitching and mumbling nonsensical babblings. 

“i know you want him to be comfortable, but we need to get him medical attention, now. he’s...” stan swallowed. “i care about richie just as much as you do. he’s one of my best friends. let’s go. please.”

that got eddie to start moving. the five of them, huddled together for safety, made their way out of the sewer. eddie would be eternally grateful towards bill, pretending as if richie wasn’t heavy as he heaved him through the water and grime. he stayed by the other the entire time, holding his hand as tightly as possible and continuing to whisper to him whenever he was conscious enough to understand him. 

“you’re gonna be fine.” he promised again and again, reaching out a hand to run through the others hair. “fine. absolutely fine. we won’t let you be anything else.”

richie lets out a choked sob and suddenly he’s talking faster than he ever had, which is really saying something. “i don’t know if i’m gonna make it but i am-“ more blood dribbled down his chin “-so happy to have you guys and ben and mike and i’m sorry about everything bill, i love you all so much and especially you eddie, i may or may not have been in love with you since we were like, i don’t, four or something, i...i dont wanna die i don’t wanna end up wherever that thing will take me i-“

eddie feels all the blood drain from his face as the others confession sets in, still feeling too far away, too fuzzy to be real. everything passes in slow motion as he soothes richie, bringing him down from whatever panic attack he was approaching.

bill only walks faster. the bikes aren’t an option so they’re left essentially running through town to the derry local hospital. he supposes that one perk of having a tiny town is that everything is close. 

none of them were going to let richie die tonight. 

🎈

the four of them are left in the waiting room of the hospital for about 4 hours. eddie is sitting the entire time, his leg bouncing as he stares painfully at the clock tick by with every second. his inhaler is in his hands, taking constant puffs despite not really needing it. bev considers saying something, but decides against it - maybe it’s important to let him have his comfort right now. 

every time a nurse enters the waiting room, his head shoots up, wiping his sweaty hands on his pink cargo shorts as he waits impatiently for his best friends’ - maybe more, he has no clue - name to be called. 

each time, the nurse isn’t calling for richie, and he sits down heavily on the chair, looking even more defeated than the last. he would cry but he already sobbed his heart out cradling richie in those sewers, and he didn’t think he had any more water left in him to cry. he knows that he would be doing so if he did. 

each of the losers took their turns comforting him. bill had scurried into the hospital bathrooms to change, richies blood absolutely coating his shirt and making him feel sick to his stomach. once he returned, he wrapped the other in his arms, and gave him the strongest hug the two had ever shared. 

eddie thanked him time and time again for carrying richie. bill told him he would be just as lost if richie were to die. he told him he couldn’t wait for the other to wake up so he could apologize for punching him. 

he told him he would talk to his parents about the spare room in their house that used to belong to georgie. eddies eyes widen, and he goes to protest, but bill cuts him off with the wave of a hand. 

“richies puh-parents probably wouldn’t care if we take him. it may take some convincing but my parents really like richie. eh-eh-especially after all this, they’ll get it. besides,” bill waved his hand, referencing to the general situation “he’s not gonna recover easily from this. he needs huh-help. his parents will never take care of him the wuh-way he needs.”

eddie nodded slowly in agreement and pulled his legs up, tucking his head in between them as he mulled his brain over it. “we gotta get him out of there.” he murmured out loud, more to himself than anyone else, but bill nodded in agreement nonetheless. 

all the losers smelled absolutely horrendous but none of them took a shower, too scared to leave that room and miss any news regarding richie. at one point, stan scooted closer to eddie and murmured “he’s gonna be okay.” and eddie simply nodded because stan had to be right or he didn’t know what he would do. 

finally, a nurse stepped into the waiting room, clipboard in hand, and called for anyone related to richie tozier. eddie was up in seconds, fully prepared to lie and cite himself as some long-lost brother or some shit. richies parents had never shown up - a fact that made his blood absolutely boil - but richie wasn’t going to be alone in that hospital room if eddie had any kind of say in it. 

the nurse raised an eyebrow at the four kids that approached her, all looking worse for wear and smelling absolutely atrocious. “any adults?” she asks, eying them suspiciously. 

“n-no. just us.” bill shakes his head and the nurse hums. 

“very well. under that fact, i suppose you may visit him. we ask you keep it to one at a time until he wakes up, but he should be doing that shortly.”

“is he doing okay?” stan asked, hands squeezed together nervously. for once, the nurse gave him a gentle smile. 

“the operation went just fine. he’s going to take quite a while recovering, and he’ll probably have some minor lasting effects, but nothing that will impair his life too drastically. your friend will be okay.”

a mutual sigh left all four mouths, and then eddie was taking a step forward, knowing in his heart that he had to be there for when richie woke up. 

none of the others protested, and eddie was lead down the white corridors. the nurse spoke gently about the care richie would need, from cleaning the wound to avoid infection in the stitches and making sure he sat down whenever he got winded and to never do anything too strenuous. the woman remarked to “please share this with his guardians whenever they’re bothered to appear”, but eddie knew richie probably wouldn’t be going back to that home. 

that was his hope, anyways. 

they stopped in front of the two doors leading into richies room and eddie took the deepest breath he could muster, lifting his shaking hands to push open the two doors in front of him. 

richie looked fucking horrible. he was so impossibly small in that bed - too small, even if he was a little underweight and tiny for his age regardless. his hair was tousled and greasy and splayed flat on the pillow, but eddie was grateful they had cleaned the majority of the blood out of it, so at least it was a true black instead of the mocking copper tone it was prior. he was hooked up to machine after machine, and with a breathing mask placed over his face. eddie felt his knees shaking underneath him and the tears flow back to his eyes. 

well, he thought, scratch that. i have more tears to cry. amazing. 

the nurse set him up a chair next to the bed and told him to call if anything changed, especially if richie woke up. despite her slightly cold demeanor, she gave eddie a solid pat on the shoulder before turning and quietly leaving the room. 

all of eddies attention was on richie. before he could think, he was grabbing the others hand, letting his eyes slide shut as he held it up to his face. he didn’t do anything, just held it tight and focused on its presence, on his presence, as he tried to bring himself down from the massive panic that the day had caused. 

somehow, against all odds, richie tozier was going to be okay, and eddie was going to kick that clowns ass for trying to make it otherwise. 

for another hour and a half, eddie sat there. he found himself talking, partially to richie and partially to himself - although he deeply hoped the other could hear him in his sleep. he rubbed his thumb over the back of the others hand repeatedly, almost massaging the area. 

and then, around two am, richie squeezed back. eddie was on his feet in a second flat, leaning over the other to get a closer look. 

“rich!” he cried as the other let out a low groan of pain, his eyelashes slowly and painfully fluttering open. he immediately winced away from the light, and eddie scurried to turn it off, wanting to make the other as comfortable as possible. 

“aw, fuck.” richie slurred out, and eddie ran back to his bed, pushing the button the nurse had told him to. 

“don’t worry.” he whispered, setting back into the chair and shifting uncomfortably in the seat. “you’re fine. you’re safe. you’re in the hospital.”

“i...survived that?” richies voice sounded like he absolutely couldn’t believe it, and eddie couldn’t help but laugh in response. “is...is everyone else okay?”

“somehow, yes. you survived it. and everyone is fine. we ran out of the sewer with you and didn’t face It. are you...are you feeling...better, at least?”

“i feel like your mom gave me a right good kiss, eddie spaghetti! good as new! completely hea-“

“beep beep, richie.” eddies smile was only affectionate as he ran his fingers through the others hair. richie seemed to relax into the motion, even leaning into it slowly. 

“i feel like i got hit by a bus. or two.” he murmured, and eddie nodded while biting his lip. “i’m sorry.” he whispered, but richie shook his head and waved him off with his hand. 

“ain’t your fault, eddie boy!”

“don’t call me that.”

“in fact-“ richie wriggled his eyebrows, and eddie groaned in exasperation - “i seem to remember getting a certain smooch from a certain princess-“

“i wish you had memory loss.”

“eddie!” he gasped, placing a bandaged hand over his chest. “you wound me! and after we have locked lips! we are practically betrothed and you treat me like this?”

eddie shook his head, and, if not just for the need to shut richie up for once, he leaned forward and connected their lips together. 

they kissed for a few long moments, completely engrossed in each other, when richie suddenly hissed in pain and leaned back. eddies arms were immediately around him, helping to ease him back into a comfortable position. 

“don’t strain yourself, idiot.” eddies voice was practically dripping with concern. 

“sorry. got too excited.” richie winked, but even he was unable to scrub the look of clear pain off of his face. eddies heart ached, and he reached out, cradling the others face in his hands like it was breakable china. richie leaned into the touch. 

“you’re not going home.” eddie whispered finally, allowing them to soak up the moment for just a few minutes. “you need some pretty close medical attention, and...we met your mom. she can’t provide that.”

richie winced, not at the pain this time, but at the thought of eddie coming face to face with his mother. “sorry you had to see that.” he chuckled, but his shoulders were tense and he was avoiding the others eyes. 

“why didn’t you ever...tell me that was happening?”

“didn’t want you to worry.”

“well, i’m worried now!” eddie huffed, shaking his head. “just...please tell me this stuff in the future. i want to be there to help you. you don’t have to be the strong one all the time, you know.”

richie was quiet at that, still avoiding the others eyes, and eddie bit the inside of his lip. he assumes that lesson will probably take quite a bit of time to set in with the other, but he was willing to work on it for however long he had to. 

“it makes sense now why you came over for so many sleepovers.” eddie remarked after a few more seconds. “i would’ve kept my window open if i knew.”

“it’s okay. your mom kept her window open for me anyways, so i always had a way in.”

“i thought you just wanted to get in my pants.”

“i mean, that too.”

eddie rolled his eyes, but leaned forward and connected their lips again nonetheless. 

yeah. they would be okay.


End file.
